Sape lg nk say GOODBYE to suhada???

After one and another!! Dalam masa 2 hari jer smpi 2 org nk tinggalkan ak da knape?? Harini shima plak tanya soalan yg buat ak pening nk pk. "Are we still friend?" Adoooiii da knape tak friend plak!!?? Just because i didn't contact/text you so bley conclude tak bff la. Serious la tak paham and that's why bila org da start sayang kita sometimes buat kt rimas. I mean it's not applied to all lah only certain pple like shima (dont get me wrong plz awk). Sama2 girls pastu wut do u aspect?? Hari-hari wassap tanya kaba?? Hello im not that kind of very ramah person at the 1st place! Siti cuti bersalin 3 bulan ade ak tanya kaba dia?? Jwpnnya ada la skali dua tu pon wassap.....dia tak jwp sudah...takyah pening kpala so end of story! Ak tak kecik hati pon siti tak reply. Yg nk kena take everything personal sgt nape ntah??

Suhada....yes dia nmpk ramah, suka senyum smpi org opis ckp "sue tu kl dtg sini mst senyum jer blablaa" "u takde prob ka always smiling?" YES tu betul..ak akan senyum dgn org yg tak rapat dan tak knal ak betul2. Tapi dgn org yg kenal, faham dan sayang ak mmg kalo ak ada masalah korang la akan jd mangsa tmpt ak lepas geram. Memang keluar semua TRUE COLOR suhada. Haaaa tu mmg rahsia dia!! So better jgn buat baik ngan ak so that korang tak sakit hati. Yess...mmg ak tgh geram ms tulis ni. Ntah hape2 tiba2 email kata "OK la kl kita takde dlm idup awak pon takde impact kt awak. Tq for this 'short' friendship". Heeyyy wut the /$=#%@()₩¥<■□\|~`° (mmg ak marah jgk sket)

Lots of things came up these few months and ak tak perlu cerita semua kat org. I talk when i feel like talking and only to selected pple i trust the most (phm2 lah sape kot). Mmg ak ramah tp bkn nk mencanang kisah hati ak. So pe mslhnya kalo ak diam, kalo ak tak text or tanya kabo org lain???? Nak kata ak selfish?? Katalah ada ak kesah!! Shima pon pnah bg setepek depan muka ak when she said "awk mmg sombong" Ak replied....yes i am! So????

Sounds bongkak kan?? Ya Allah.... sebenarnya tidak langsung sbb ak tak dpt apa pon for being SOMBONG ni tau. Tolong la faham, ak akan amik berat org2 tertentu je dlm hidup ak. Bila sy risaukn awk, sy cari awk mcm org sparuh gile that shows sy senang dan sayang awk. Tapi sayang suhada mahal haha... Shima u r my bff but sometimes sy kurang selesa dgn layanan awk yg extra special tuk sy. I do appreciate all u've done before tp sy tak blh paksa diri sy. Bila kt rs nk tanya kaba awk then i'll do it but if not cool jelah takyah heart2 feeling sgt. Haiiyya agaknya hati kita hati batu kot erk!!!

 Mula2 tadi ak pk maybe shima yg over react tp when i was thinking bout "action should speaks louder than word" trus ak rs.... "OK u r the one who actually created/brought probs into their life" Dah kalo 2org saying gudbye to you at the same time mst la ko punca masalahnya. Cakap sayang tapi tak tunjuk, cakap appreciate tp tak reti nk reward or amik hati!! Hhmmm..yela2 ak teruk sbb tu sume org lari. Abg pon marah sue bila sue voice out apa sue rs. Abg pon nk pegi tinggalkn sue ker??? Ada sape2 lg nk buat camtu buatlah biar sue hidup sorg2 jer. Satu je yg sue nk pesan...better don't try to get closer to me OTHERWISE YOU'LL GET HURT!! Ak tak blh buat korang sume bahagia pon so why must you all stay????? I can't pleased everyone. Kalau la awk baca mesti bertambah BENCI awk dgn saya kn tp sy akan usaha buat mcm yg awk remind 'action should always speaks louder than word'......susahnya sy nk faham :'(