It was Monday

Isnin, Selasa dan harini dah Rabu tp still serabut ko tak hilang lg kn suhada. Eleh ak tau ko kalo serabut cane! Mcm la ak baru kenal ko harini kan. Ak hidup dgn ko da nk masuk 29thn tau tahun depan. Seriously keje pon effected smpi takde mood nk pk byk2 bila org tanya soalan. Malas jadinya nk buat banyak benda,moody berangin tak tentu psl so harini MC. Reasons sbb kaki kebas sbb darah manyak kuar badan lembik sket tp yg paling sakit sebenarnya jiwa...huhuhu apa la ko ni suhada!!! Bila stress ni yg elok nye satu jelah,ak rajin mengemas umah. Kepala dah serabut so mmg beganda2 lah serabut kl rumah sepah. Kalau nk tau rahsia....workstation/rumah ak kalo bersepah berselerak tu maksudnya ak OK or happy or takde masalah lah. Dan biasanya kalau tempat tu kemas je maknanya suhada is not OK so be careful.

Menyesal???? No way lah why should I??? Org dah kata takan dtg yg ko nk paksa dan tunggu jgk pahal?? At least ak dah tunaikan janji dan ak takleh marah sape2. Separuh hati ak kata "sure mst akan dtg punya" but undeniable that separuh lg hati ak ckp "takan dtg punye percayalah" Tapi yg bagusnya ak maintain positive jgk tak kira keadaan cemana pon.

What i feel right now???? Dua hari dah berlalu, perasaan nk marah tu takde cuma rasa cam org bodow sket ada la and most of all sebenarnya truly dissapointed!! Luckily ada cik shima and she's my only survivor that day. She offered herself to accompany me coz worried if im waiting alone so I agreed! Dia sgt memahami Tq Allah for grant me such a good sweet bff. Satu yg buat ak sgt syg cik shima ni bcoz she's not a jugdgemental person and super duper understanding. She's like takkan fikir benda2 negative langsung psl benda yg dia tak ade dlm situasi tu. Normally she'll keep listen, listen and listen again, she's definitely a good listener. Seriously ak tak pernah jmp girl friend mcm dia. BFF ak yg lain biasanya tak abih cakap lg dah menyampuk pastu judge mcm2 camlah dorang tak pnah buat salah jgk. Hahahha...apa pon suhada always win OK!! Nampak kan keras kepala suhada tu cemana??? =p

What happened last Monday was, my 1st intention is to wait by myself tapi shima risau sgt so dia kata takperlah dia teman dulu sampai awak datang pastu nanti dia gerak la. Clock was clicking after one

to another hour but still tak nampak apa pon. Nasib baik ada shima kan kalau tak blh imagine tak apa jadi menunggu sorang2 dlm keadaan hujan yg sgt lebat tu??? Sapa nak kisah pon kan.... Lately byk je kan kes ntah hape2 ada org gile mengamuk la, kes tikam tembak org la same tu buat aku takut sket nak berjalan sendiri. Dulu ak pnah ckp ak tak takut berdiri/tunggu sorang2 kat tmpt yg ak familiar lg pon ini KL. Tapi skrg org gila byk sgt so kena gak blaja takut kdg2. "Kalau saya mmg takan la nk biar awak sorang2 berdiri tunggu situ malam2 plak tu, da la awk tu kecik je". Hhhmmm no comment!!

Hujan lebat masa tu mcm sgt touching dan seakan memberitahu sesuatu. Ceewah...ak suka bau hujan rs tenang tp takut kilat ngan guruh. Nasib la hujan Isnin tu takde kilat sgt. Seingat aku sepanjang aku bercakap dengan shima mata aku ni melilau je mencari sesuatu. Somehow, i just felt someone was staring back at me! Perasan je suhada ni padahal ko sebenarnya nak menafikan apa yang ko fikir selama ni tak betul kan! Terima jelah kenyataannya sekarang sbb belum terlambat lagi. Macam mana ak boleh yakin yg pertemuan tu akan jadi ak pon tak tau lah. 

Jam 8:30 dan ak kena gi Subang amik abg so sampai situ jelah. Shima kata "it's OK awak everything is goin to be fine and he will find you someday. No need to think much lagi pon maybe something came up and he just couldn't make it that day, plus it's raining kan" what a relief to hear that rite tp cik shima awak takyah la nk sedapkan hati saya. Saya akan go thru bnd ni jgk cepat atau lambat tp apa pon kata2 awk buat saya tenang jgk. Tq sbb sabar dan dengar semua cerita saya tanpa sikit pon menyalahkan saya.

Lately jgk ak byk baca quote pictures tuk motivate diri tuk tersenyum. Banyak yg menarik dan ni antaranya

Anyone who cares and love me can only choose either to "TAKE ME AS I AM" or "WATCH ME AS I WALK AWAY" coz I can't be anybody else.

I really hope I didn't destroy a "U" either

We have lots2 of similarities making the first thing looks very possible but when it comes to respect the differences we were failure somehow. So pathetic.....